Tuesday, March 29, 2011
expectations
The desire to improve is your friend as long as it is not in the form of a rigid goal. Deal with reality as it is and adapt rather than thinking your are going to 'recover", it is less pressure on you. You should extend this courtesy to others also. Because our limitations are not openly visible, most will not alter their behavior in respect to it. Rather than letting this frustrate you, use it as a constant bar of achievement that is set by others. If you can routinely pass this bar, you are for all intents and purposes, recovered. It will not be as it was before, but it will be socially functional. It is good to have goals beyond this, as long as they do not frustrate you to the point of quitting.
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For those of you close to someone who is recovering from a stroke it is a fine line between compassion and coddling. Support supports growth, but can retard it as well. We all adapt as we are forced to, and overcompensation can steal the drive to recover just as fast as under compensation. You will also have to adapt to the situation. Do not fear about getting it wrong so much you burn yourself out. I would not be here without support from family and friends, and believe it or not, adapting is an organic act that is easier when you focus more on the identifying/addressing of problems than the end goal of recovery to your former self.One is possible, and one is not. Recovery means progress, not the reinstatement of a previous state of being.
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